


Of All The Men I've Loved Before

by Puregold



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Also first chapter does get kinda graphic during Taako's part fair warning, Child Sexual Abuse, Childhood Trauma, Dissociation, Flashbacks, Fuck Sazed (The Adventure Zone), Hurt/Comfort, I'm not writing anything graphic here its not a gross fetish fic, M/M, Night Terrors, Nightmares, Past Sexual Abuse, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Read at your own discretion, Sleepwalking, The rape and underage tags are just precautionary, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-07-02 07:33:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15791934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Puregold/pseuds/Puregold
Summary: Taako has always been very cagey and bottled up about his past. Even though the voidfish told their story on the Starblaster, there was nothing about before or what happened after. And Taako was grateful for that. My Gods, was he grateful.Because perhaps if Kravitz knew, if any of his friends knew, they wouldn't love him anymore.





	1. Wine

**Author's Note:**

> Whaddup sluts! Its my therapy fic; where Taako gets therapy!
> 
> Its a proxy for me getting therapy, lol!
> 
> PLEASE READ TAAKO'S PART AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION. It's not terribly graphic but it gets kinda icky!

Kravitz knew better than to pry. He had tried before, tried so desperately to coax Taako into trusting him, to convince him to perhaps see a therapist. Even if he didn't want to talk to a professional stranger, there was always Lucretia. She had gotten a bachelors in psychology back on their homeworld, after all.

But unfortunately, the relationship between Taako and Lucretia was still slowly mending, and trying to talk with Taako about his past only upset him. Even if Taako knew everything about his own dark past, that he had been sacrified by a necromantic cult at a young age and granted Reaper status from the Raven Queen out of pity. Taako still refused. So Kravitz backed off for now. At least, until his and Lucretia's relationship got strong enough to broach the topic of therapy once again.

The only thing Kravitz knew about Taako's past was what his night terrors would let him know. Taako, during his night terrors, was also a chronic sleepwalker. Perhaps it has something to do with him having constantly been on the run his whole life, from something or other. Sometimes the night terrors are something Kravitz is familiar with, like the Hunger or his dear sister Lup being locked away in an umbrella for so long right under Taako's nose. He blames himself for that, Gods does Kravitz know. Blames himself for forgetting, even if he couldn't have possibly remembered no matter how hard he wanted to.

Other times, Taako's nightmares would cycle over to Glamour Springs, something Kravitz was completely out of his depth with. Anytime he'd dream of that or Sazed, Kravitz got a bit more information on Taako's past, without his consent, of course. From what he could just barely piece together, Sazed was an awful, dirty man. He did things to Taako that were indescribable. It was a whirlwind of psychological manipulation, and physical, mental, and even _sexual_ abuse.

Of course, Kravitz never told Taako that he knew. He tried to ask Taako about a nightmare once before, told him what he saw, and Taako refused to sleep in the same bed as Kravitz for a month, terrified that more information would leak out without his knowledge. All that Kravitz could do was be there for Taako, during his nightmares, his flashbacks, his panic attacks, everything.

Tonight was one of those nights. Kravitz and Taako were both fast asleep, and it began as it always does; with whimpering, a slight shifting in sleep and light kicks. That usually pulled Kravitz out of his slumber to witness the next part; Taako rising before pulling himself out of bed and silently leaving the room. At first, Kravitz wasn't quite sure wether Taako was awake or not, watching him leave before he sat up in bed himself and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

He first heard Taako in the kitchen before he got up. If Taako was sleepwalking after all, it would be dangerous for him by himself. So Kravitz followed Taako into the kitchen, watching from a distance as Taako took a rather large wine bottle out of a cabinet.

 ..........................

It was a blur at first. The edges of my vision were warm and fuzzy as I seemed to recall being in the back of a caravan. A tall, lean man with sunken eyes leered at me with a smile as he held a bottle of wine in his hands.

 _"I know you're rather young,"_ he began, mischief in his eyes. _"But from you and your sister's cooking, I understand that you have a keen eye for delicacies such as this. Care to try?"_ He asked, before offering me the bottle.

Excitement and boyish mischief danced in my eyes as I took the bottle without question, delighted to participate in any kind of illicit activity. I recall taking a swig, gulping down a third of the bottle before handing it back over, head swimming.

 _"'S delishus!"_ I had said. I was lying. It tasted like fire burning up my throat, but it's fine because drinking alcohol is _cool_ and _fun_ and _dangerous_.

The man laughed. "Figured you'd might like that. How ya feelin?"

 _"Sleepy..."_ I articulated, rubbing at my eyes and blinking. I just felt very slow and heavy.

The man frowned."Well, perhaps you ought to lay down for a nap then."

 _"Awlright"_ I barely managed to slur out before he scooped me up and carried me over to a small couch, laying me down with a pillow under my head.

It was barely a minute before I felt his hands on me. My skirt? My legs, why are you touching my legs? Perhaps if I just keep my eyes closed and pretend to be sleeping, he'd go away. He didn't. My eyes fluttered open as I felt some fleshy, cylindrical object rub against my exposed buttocks. Oh, his privates. He was rubbing his privates on me. I looked up at him curiously, but I didn't say no. He made eye contact with me but he didn't stop. He continued rubbing himself against me and touching me until something hot and sticky came out of him, and I pulled away in disgust.

 _"ew, what is this stuff?"_ I had asked.

 _"It's my happy juice."_ He had replied, and looking back that was such a stupid fucking thing to call it and it almost makes me laugh. _"It means you've made me very happy."_

 _"Oh."_ I had replied. _"Well, if it makes you happy then I guess it isn't so bad."_ What a fucking mistake.

After that, he had payed a lot more attention to me. Lavished me with praise and affection when he could. Lup was suspicious, of course. Perhaps even jealous. But that didn't stop us and our special private time we'd have together. I fell in love with him. I was only 10, yet I loved him as if I was a fairytale prince and he was my knight. I was only 10 and yet I knew things no child should, felt things no child should. It didn't last long. Soon enough, during some sort of theivery gone wrong, he ditched both Lup and I. I cried for hours, and vowed never again to fall in love for fear of being hurt. And that's how I viewed every travelling caravan Lup and I would ride in since.

 ..........................

My eyes shot up in worry when he grabbed that bottle of wine, and I made my way into the kitchen with haste, standing right by him in case I needed to take the wine, and prevent my husband from drinking in a sleepwalking fit.

"I was only a kid..." He muttered. "Why would he hurt me, I was only a kid..."

I blinked at him a few times, watching as instead of opening it to take a drink, he simply sunk to his knees on the floor.

"Was only a kid..." He repeated. "Was only a kid..."

He started to raise his head, thunking it agaist the cabinet in front of him rythmically before I sat by his side and put my hand up over the harsh wood of the cabinet so he wouldn't hurt himself. "C'mon, love, let's get you back to bed." I whispered.

"Bed?..." He muttered. "Is it time?..." Before he drearily rose to his feet, setting down the wine bottle as he started clumsily trying to slip off his clothes. "Yes, okay... Go ahead..."

I grimaced, pulling his robe back on him as I grabbed his hands in my own. "No, darling, it's time to sleep."

"In my sleep?..." He asked, voice at a whisper. "You like me in my sleep?"

I gritted my teeth, thoroughly disgusted with whatever it was Taako was reliving. "No, just normal. Regular sleep, no touching."

"Oh, okay..." He replied, then kind of smiled in relief, like he was able to get out of something he didn't want to do. I shivered, before taking his hand and gently leading him back to bed.


	2. Images

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kravitz normally loves making love with Taako. He took great pleasure in getting Taako to enjoy himself, relishing in every pleased moan, whimper and sigh that would escape past his lips.
> 
> But this time it was different. After all, did Taako really want this? Or was he simply repeating his own cycle of abuse with Kravitz? The thought made him shiver.

Taako wrapped his arms around Kravitz, pulling their bodies close together as he rutted against him, sloppily kissing at his jaw and neck.

Kravitz groaned, sliding his hands down Taako's back over to cup his ass as Taako made a noise of approval, before he pulled away and slipped off his robe.

"I'm all yours, babe~" He said flirtatiously, licking his lips before he resumed grinding against Kravitz and kissing at his neck.

That didn't sit quite right with Kravitz, putting a sour taste in his mouth as he attempted to resist Taako's charm and allure for the first time in his life. "T-Taako, wait-"

Taako almost instantly pulled away, halting his grinding motions as he looked at Kravitz expectantly. "Yeah?"

"Are you- are you sure you want to do this?" He asked, and Taako all but laughed.

"Um, yeah? I'm _always_ down to do this, my man. Why? Do you not wanna do this?"

"No, it's not that, I..." Kravitz bit his lip as he stared at Taako. He's never felt this way about sex with him before; even when he knew about Sazed. But something feels... Different, knowing that Taako was taken advantage of and groomed from such a young age. "I just don't want to feel as if I'm taking advantage."

Taako instantly grew suspicious and defensive, drawing back as he slid off Kravitz's lap. "Why would you feel like your taking advantage?"

Kravitz sighed. There was no way he was getting out of this now, might as well just bite the bullet. "Taako, I... I... _know_ about... Sazed, and about your... childhood." He began, hoping to phrase it as delicately as he could.

Taako's eyes widdened in alarm as his ears shot back, alert, and Kravitz quickly held Taako's hand as he continued. "I just- I don't want you to feel as if you _have_ to do this, Taako. And I don't want- I don't want to be... Complicit, in continueing this cycle of abuse and helping you relive your trauma."

Taako pulls away from his hand as if they're hot coals, before looking away and leaving the bed. "Oh, I see what's going on here. You think I'm _disgusting_."

Kravitz immediately backpedaled, looking at the back of Taako's head as he sat on the edge of the bed. "No, Taako, I don't think you're- I don't think you're disgusting, or anything like that. I'm just worried-"

"No no, Krav, I heard you loud an clear!" He says, voice shrill and tears pricking at his eyes as he hastily gets dressed. "You think becuase I got taught what sex was too young that I can't be _normal_ anymore, huh? That I can't have fucking- happy, regular-ass sex with anyone anymore, huh? That no matter what my years of fucking _training_ will always be there?"

Kravitz sputtered, unable to reply as Taako grabbed his hat and left the room. "I'm getting a drink. _don't_ fucking follow me."

Kravitz waited to hear the front door slam shut before letting out a sigh. That certainly could've gone better.

.....................

Stupid fucking night terrors, always giving me away. Even back on the moon, I'd dream of Glamour Springs and given myself away to Magnus and Angus. Luckily for me, they had only scratched the surface of my fucking well of trauma.

Is it trauma? Can I even fucking call it that when its all I had known? When I was taught and raised around these terrible things and learned to coexist with them?

Could I even call it trauma when Lup was hurting far worse than I could ever know? She was the one who had to stay locked up in a fucking prison, doomed to watch as her only twin and dearest friends forgot she even _fucking_ existed.

Could I even call it trauma when we were saving the world? Saving plane after plane, yet letting so many fall through the cracks in a desperate game of hunt and chase. When all of my dearest friends, my _family_ went through the exact same thing? When the entire universe knew about it and praised us for it?

Could I even call it trauma when 40 people died by my hand? Even if it wasn't me, if I didn't directly poison them myself, I made way for a cruel murderer to do it for me. I trusted him so much, too much, allowing him to do things to me and get inside my head like a goddamn parasite. Perhaps if I was stronger, if I had a greater will- Perhaps if Lup had been there, I could have shut it down. Then those 40 some-odd folks would still be around.

"Hey baby, lemme buy you a drink." Slurred a large orc man who had taken a seat at the bar beside me. He must be so drunk he doesn't even recognize me, doesn't even know who I am.

 _Go home with him._ Said the unsavory part of my brain. _Go fuck him and show Kravitz that you're still desirable. That he has no clue what he's missing out on until you're gone._

I opt instead for a "Fuck off," before downing a shot, which willed the orc man away.

How could Kravitz fucking think that of me? That I'm not... Sane enough to have sex? _Because he's right. Because you've been dogtrained to sit on any dick that comes your way out of fear of losing the ones you love._ I flick my wrist, willing that voice in my head to dissipate. How could Kravitz look at _me_ , after knowing me for so long, marrying me, knowing what I _really_ look like after Wonderland, and decide that he doesn't want me anymore? That I'm now undesirable now that he knows all the men who've come before him.

Nevermind, I fucking get it. I wouldn't wanna have sex with me either if I knew about all my past endeavors, let alone date or marry me. I just wish I could turn off my night terrors and my sleepwalking, preventing my brain from betraying me ever again. Because I was fucking right. Now that he knows all the gorey details, I'm _ugly_ to him.

I shake my head, before ordering three more shots and downing them like theres no tomorrow. Fuck it. Alcohol never did me wrong.

.....................

After Taako is out of the house, Kravitz pulls out his stone of farspeech and decides to call Lup.

"Whaddup, bone boy?" She asks. "Need help with a bounty or somethin?"

"No, it's not that. It's Taako." He's had this conversation with her about her sibling three times before.

"I'm on my way." She says, before tearing a hole in the astral plane that Kravitz can hear opening in the living room.

"No, it's not- Are you home right now?"

"Uhh, yeah? You wanna come over here, then?"

"Yes please." He replied. Kravitz wasn't too keen on experiencing the wrath of Taako if he came home whilst Kravitz was conversing with his sister about him.

It took the same amount of time for Kravitz to open a portal to her living room, and he stepped through to smile at her warmly. "How has your day been?"

She snorts. "Enough of that nonsense. What's the deal with my brother?"

He took a deep breath before replying. "...Communication issues."

She laughs. "Isn't it just like that with him?" She then moves to her comfy chair, inviting Kravitz over to the couch to join her. "Talking about the Staff or Glamour Springs with him was no easy feat for me either."

"Yes. Well, um." He hesitated, as there was really no easy way to broach this subject. "What... What do you know about Taako's- Well, his, uh, sexual history?" He cringes awkwardly.

Lup laughs. "Are you asking me if the dude gave you an STD? Because if so I think-"

"No, no." Kravitz shook his head. "I meant trauma-wise. Like, when he was... Younger."

Lup's smile drops at that, and she sits up straighter, lips pursed. "What has he told you?"

"Well, not much, admittedly." Confesses Kravitz. "It, well, his frequent nightmares and sleepwalking tell me more than he'd ever confess himself. I know that- something... Sexual happened to him at a young age, and he was in an abusive relationship with Sazed. That's really it."

Lup sighs. "Taako's always been... Very locked up about his past. Of course, I consider myself to be rather private about the whole ordeal as well, but... Well, therapy has really helped me and I've told Barry everything he needs to know. That being said, I... I'm not gonna tell you anything he hasn't shared with you, Kravitz, but yeah. You're gonna have to have a pretty ugly conversation with him in the near future."

"You're right, I just..." He sighs. "I was hoping that perhaps you could give me some insight as to the most... Delicate way I could talk with him about it."

"Just be honest with him!" She replies. "But not, like. Brutally honest. Be gentle too, which, if what Taako says is true you won't have any trouble with." She then smiles warmly at him.

He smiles back, relieved to know someone in Taako's life whom he trusts so completely. "Thanks. I, um. I hope to hear from you soon, Lup."

"Catcha later, skeletor!" She chides, throwing up a peace sign as Kravitz tears a portal back to their living room.

When he steps through, he notices Taako sitting on the couch and watching some cooking program on TV as he sips a glass of wine. As he hears Kravitz enter, he looks over his shoulder and rather loudly exclaims, "Whaddup, bonefucker!"

He then rather drunkenly stands, setting his wine glass down on the coffee table before turning to face Kravitz as he flings off his heels. "I got somthin' t'say t'you!"

Kravitz observes him worriedly, vanishing scythe before stepping over to him. "Taako, I-"

"No, NO!" He shouts stubbornly. "You- you shuddup an listen t'me, cause I got... I got some news f'r you, babe!" He says, before pulling off his crop top with ease. "I am SO'S HOT!"

He continues shouting as he slides his skirt down, now standing before Kravitz in nothing but a frilly pair of panties. "I am the SEXIEST BITCH in the UNIVERSE!" He shouts, voice waivering with emotion as tears prick at his eyes. "I can'd.... I can'd BELIEVE that you think- I can't possibly wanna have... _sssex_ with anybody by MYSELF!"

At this point, the tears start to flow openly as he sniffles. "I'm a grown fuckin' man!" He hiccups, desperately wiping at his eyes. "An all that ssshit w's back then! This's now! I'm not _dirty_ !" he all but screams, shaking.

Kravitz frowns, his heart all but breaking to see Taako like this as he crosses the room and wraps his jacket around Taako in an attempt to cover him up, before pulling him closely and rubbing his shoulders soothingly. "...I don't think you're dirty."

He sniffles, burrying his head in Kravitz's shoulder before slurring out. "But you said you didn' wan... Wan me no more..."

Kravitz all but tears up as well. "Is that- Is that how you interpreted...? Oh, no... _No_ , Taako, I..." He smooths a hand over Taako's hair before planting a kiss to his temple. "No, dearest, I was... Worried that you felt pressured, is all. Like you had to."

Taako shakes his head. "Never. Never with you. Well, maybe at first but-" He takes a deep, shaky breath and wipes at his eyes, trying to calm himself down. "But then you made me feel good, and... You still loved me when I had flashbacks 'n panic attacks... An when I got ugly..." His face screws up with that last sentence as he tenses up, feeling ill.

"You never got ugly, Taako." Kravitz reassures, gingerly taking Taako by the hand and leading him off to their bedroom. "Let's get dressed, and then we can continue this conversation. How's that sound?"

Taako nods, and Kravitz kisses his eyelids before shutting the door behind him.


	3. Warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taako opens up to Kravitz about his past, and the two start taking baby steps together in his healing process.

After getting dressed and calming down, washing the dry tears off my face, I sit on our bed, snuggling Kravitz as he braids my hair. My drunken haze has mostly faded, leaving me in a rather calm, cried-out and relaxed state. Needless to say, it was a bit... Embarassing, breaking down like that in front of Kravitz, but it wasn't the first time. And from what it sounds like it certainly won't be the last.

I take a deep breath, resting a hand on Kravitz's knee as I speak. "I'm... Just gonna give you the facts, and, like, the surface trauma today, dude."

He seems to nod approvingly. "Anywhere is a good start."

I gulp. He already knows the cliffnotes version, so why not just take the bull by the horns and dive the fuck in already? "I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms-" I cut myself off with my laughter, relishing as Taako joins in before nudging me.

"Your laughter messed up my braid!" He complains with a smile.

"Yeah, yeah, okay." I reply with a smile. "Jus wanted to lighten the mood a bit first, bubbulah. So, like, as you know Lup and I lived with our aunt till we were, like, 10, right? 'N she passed away, and we didn't have any other living relatives to be passed off to, and at that time in that area orphanages fucking _sucked_ , so we ran away and managed to scrape by however we could. It... It was hard, but at least we were free."

I recall, reflecting back to nights spent in the cold, huddling together for body warmth. I clead my throat. "Anyways. One of our first... I don't quite remember, we'd been traveling around, but one of the first few caravans we were in I met this guy. And I, like, really liked him, yknow? Only other family I had was my sister so parental love was... Kinda hard to come by." I sigh through my nose, examining my manicured fingers as I continue. "So, like, he was the first to take advantage of me, obviously. And of course... Lup didn't... Really know about it, because it was our little secret, yknow? But, uh. We eventually moved to a different caravan, and, well... The same happened to her." I laugh, though there's no mirth to it. "And I got jealous! We actually- Two fucking 11 year olds, arguing about their feelings about their own sexual abuse." I shook my head, biting my lip as guilt and shame overwhelmes me. How could I have _ever_ said those things to Lup? Been so deseperate for the attention of gross old men that I wanted something she so desperately _didn't_ ? "Anyways, it... Affected us differently. She was pretty damn touch averse well into her teen years, right? For a long time I was the only one allowed to give her hugs or cuddle or whatever. And, well... We all know I how I dealt with it."

"I didn't... After that first guy, uh, did what he did to me, I didn't really love anybody for a long time. Like, sure, I let pretty much anybody fuck me, but I didn't _love_ them. Until... Y'know." I gesture vaguely, obviously talking about Sazed. "At first it was nothing. He was just my employee- my stage hand- and sometimes we'd fuck and that was it. But it- it was clear he always had feelings and... The longer he stayed, the easier it was for me to... Fall for him. And... Well, my track record for _love_ wasn't exactly great. I... Basically did anything for him to stay with me. 'Till the name. I just- I mean, looking back on it, it probably had something to do with Lup, but at the time I felt so fucking sick at the idea of sharing that title with him."

"And what a fucking mistake that was! A name, Taako!? Really, a name!? I couldn't've just let him have that, and then 40 people wouldn't be fucking dead!" I sigh deeply, biting my lip to keep from crying. "I know I'm not supposed to blame myself or whatever, but how can I _not?_ It was so fucking obvious the type of person he was, but I still stuck with him! I'm such a fucking _idiot_..." I hiss, biting back more tears.

Kravitz finishes the braid, tying it off in a bow before he rests a finger under my chin, gently guiding my gaze towards him as he leans down to kiss my nose. "You're not an idiot. I can only imagine how hard it must be to love somebody so horrible. You can't help your emotions, Taako, and you can't help the past. It's useless and unhealthy to keep going over what _could've_ been, when the reality of what happened is far past. It's alright, you're allowed to heal now."

I sniffle, a few tears managing to slide their way down my cheeks as I wrap Kravitz up in a hug, pulling him close and holding him tightly. "You're such a good listener, God... You're so fucking _patient_ "

Kravitz smiles, chuckling lightly. "Well, being dead for thousands of years will do that to a person."

I laugh into his shoulder, squeezing him tightly as we snuggle. "Taako, so you know what your... Triggers are? Aside from garlic and sometimes cooking, I mean."

I think long and hard on that one for a second, searching deep within myself for an answer. "...Feeling alone, I think. Because Lup and I were on our own for so long, and when my memory got erased..." I bite my tongue, unable to even finish the sentence. "So if I'm like, out an about I always have my Stone of Farpseech on my and when I'm home alone... It never really leaves my side."

Kravitz nodded into Taako's hair, kissing his forehead. "Alright, love. What about your night terrors?"

"Just wake me up." I lament. "I know they say you're not supposed to wake a sleepwalker or whatever but just fucking do it. As far as, them, like, actually _happening_ goes, I think... It all stemmed from keeping it so bottled up? So now that I've... Started to open up, they should die down... Hopefully."

"I hope so too. I'll wake you if need be... I love you."

"Love ya too, Krav."

The next morning, I'm whipping up some pancakes for the two of us while Kravitz sits at the table, sipping a cup of black coffee. He hesitates, before deciding to speak up. "So... Taako. I... I'm very glad that you were able to open up to me last night. And aside from talking it over with Lup and I, and watching out for triggers, I do believe that... Professional help- therapy- would be in your best interest."

I go deadly still and silent, watching the pancake sizzle on the pan as I gulp and lick my lips. Opening up to people has never really been my strong suit- and even if they are a _professional,_ I still don't feel at all comforted by the idea of talking my deep-rooted issues over with a complete stranger. "Yeah, babe, I uh... I dunno if I'm ready for all that anytime soon. 'Specially not down with the whole 'confessing to a stranger' deal."

Kravitz took a deep breath, before sighing as he spoke. "Well, there's always Lucretia. She's not a stranger, and she's well-trained in the-"

I laugh passive aggressively before flipping the final pancake and setting it atop a plate of several others. "Oh, great idea, Kravitz. Talk to her about my deepest darkest fears so that she can disappear those for me." I stop, abruptly dropping the utensils in the sink as I whip around to face Kravitz. "Actually, that's a good idea. If I forget about it all I won't have to deal with it anymore, right?" My face goes pale and I feel myself begin to shake, feeling sick to my stomach as I think of my dear sister Lup. I could never do that to her- leave her alone with all that baggage whilst I just conveniently forget.

"I-I'm sorry for bringing it up." Kravitz stutters. "It's- It's clearly... Still a sensitice issue for you. We don't... We can change the subject, if you like. How's school?"

I take a deep breath, delighted by the idea of talking about something nice and easy for a change. Last night was _nothing_ but emotional bullshit, after all. "It's going fairly well, I think. The bonus of teaching college is that there aren't really any... Problem students. Like, in highschool and shit you just have to put up with it and give them detention or whatever. In college you straight-up get _expelled_ , baby."

I bring two plates of pancakes over to the table, setting them down as I sit across from my husband. "It can be... Weird, having Angus in one of my classes. I have to act like I have zero favoritism for the little shit, I have to act like his _teacher_ and it's so fucking _weird_." I laugh. "I mean, the kid helped us save the world! He can get all the A's in the world in my fuckin opinion. Plus he's smart as all hell so it's not like he'd do poorly anyways."

I see, says Kravitz with an easy smile. "I see. I'm glad to hear the both of you are doing well. We should have him over for dinner sometime."

I almost choke on my food as I remember. "Right! I invited him over for dinner this Friday. Sorry, I forgot to tell you. I dunno if you'll be home or not, but uh, yeah."

"That sounds delightful! Just him, then?"

"Just him. I feel so fuckin' weird about him sharing a dorm with college students. Don't like it! You know they're not feeding him, unless it's _weed brownies_. " I scoff. "I mean, c'mon. I just don't trust that shit! No sir!"

Kravitz seems to ponder that for a second, taking a bite of his pancakes before replying. "Well, if you're so averse to his current living situation, why not invite him to stay with us?"

I'd thought about it before. I not sure that I'd be... The best _fit_ for raising and housing Angus. Especially since, well, I hardly have my shit together and I don't want to subject Angus to my broken psyche and ugly recovery process. I guess that's why none of us have taken him in yet. But... Well, that's hardly fair to Ango, is it? I mean, we've practically become his family during our stint on the moonbase together. None of us have our shit together, after all, probably not even Angus! I mean, we can't... Dump him like that, can we?

"Taako?" Kravitz asks. "You kinda zoned out there, everything okay?"

"Yeah! Yeah. Just... Thinking."


End file.
